Bobby Adair, Author
(This is the fictional semi-bullshit version that Bobby wanted to put in this section. – Kat)
Bobby Adair is a former programmer, with a long-lived passion for writing.
On working a corporate job...
I was just another off-white American who used to sit within four cube walls of a blandly unidentifiable color and stare at a computer screen trying to will esoteric snippets of code into compilings of software. Or, some might say that I explored the limits of how little productive work a man can do while still managing to pay my rent, feed my dogs, and maintain the uninterrupted status of my bi-weekly compensation. At work...mostly I just stared.
Sometimes the staring lead to daydreaming, and sometimes, through no effort of my own, the daydreams turned into temporally rambling yarns. And then, when the caffeine flow hit a mysteriously optimal level—right before the headaches and jitters kick in—motivation materialized out of the ether and my fingers got all clickety-clack on the nearest computer keyboard. Then before I knew it, a novel was splattered all over my word processing software.
At that point, I would always ask, who am I to let my own lack of motivation keep that which the caffeine gods have bestowed upon me away from the righteously deserving readers of eBooks? The answer was always something like, "nobody." So, I would go to the store, purchase more gallons of sugary caffeine-laden liquids, and trudge through the effort organizing and editing all of those nearly psychotic babblings into coherent stories. Yeah, I know, you’re probably asking, how can one man be forced to suffer so much beneath the tempestuous whims of the wicked muses of pseudo literature? Well, that question is beyond the metaphysical aptitudes of we mere mortals to understand. So, I simply accept the burden that a productively sedentary life has placed on me and I produce tremendously actual works of fiction.
In closing, tempered by the degree to which you may feel gratitude, I say, "you’re welcome, world!"
Kat's Version of "About Bobby"
As Bobby's "other half" of over ten years and his content editor, I've gotten to know him really well, and have been entertained beyond belief.
Bobby's "About Me" above does NOT tell the whole story! Where do I begin?
Bobby Adair is an incredibly intelligent, incredibly witty and sarcastic pain in the ass. He fancies himself as a hermit and introvert, but he has a personality that is more entertaining and social than he'd like to admit. However, that doesn't stop him from believing that he's this bitter old curmudgeon who has to put up this facade to the world. He seems to be entertained by that...maybe that's just the life of a writer. I don't recall a checkbox for that on eHarmony...
He also has the vocabulary that rivals the most salty of sailors. He doesn't even bother to turn it off when he's carrying on a conversation with my mother.
As far as the particulars, we met in Austin, Texas back in 2007, but on a whim moved to Highlands Ranch, Colorado in 2012 after we were both laid off from a pretty soul-sucking, cutthroat financial services company that was like a never-ending game of Survivor. After almost three glorious years in Colorado, we realized that my family needed us back in Texas, and at the end of 2014 we started looking for a home back in the Lone Star State. We both love the beach, so we looked closely at Port Aransas, Texas, and found a few leads, but headed briefly back to Denver to start packing. (Port Aransas and Rockport were destroyed a couple of years later in a hurricane…yikes!). Then one night, we found a house on Zillow, jumped in the car the next morning, drove back to Austin, saw the house, put in an offer, and hurriedly went back to Denver to finish packing. We closed within a couple of weeks before we knew what was happening, and packed up our two puppies for the new adventure.
(We miss Colorado…)
They're a couple of great rescues we got in Austin...Bobby even zombified the dogs with the Walking Dead iPhone app. He has been interested in photography lately, and is taking a lot of really great photos, which are posted on the site. He has two grown kids back in Texas who are wonderful human beings. And you'll almost never see him without his trusty Texas Longhorn ball cap and sunglasses. It's a signature look for him. See the HAZMAT jungle photo above...
As long as I've known him, he's had this burning desire to break out of cube city (hence the ramblings above) and write. He's even written a couple of books that you won't find on Amazon...because writing for him was more than just publishing a book and making money. It was a means of creative self-expression that helped him deal with the ups and downs of life.
In fact, some of the characters scattered throughout his books are actually real people in his life. One example...in his novel Flying Soup, the evangelical preacher portrayed in the book was a real person that his parents dragged him to see at a tent revival when he was about ten years old. The first publisher that he submitted the book to told him that the character was too "over-the-top," and gave Bobby the dream-crushing news that the publisher wasn't interested...at all. When a relative read the book for the first time, he said, "hey, isn't that the preacher we saw when we were kids?"
Bobby takes his writing very seriously. Even if it is a zombie book, he treats it as if he were writing the next great American classic. It's been amazing to read his work...his first book, Ace Gonzo was a Sci-Fi thriller with enough naughtiness that would have made it a sure classic with middle- and high-school boys if he'd actually left it up on Amazon. Thanks to print-on-demand technology, there are only a few copies running around...maybe something you could take to the Gold & Silver "Pawn Stars" Pawn Shop years from now and Rick, Cory, The Old Man, and Chumlee might give you a few bucks.
You will notice patterns in his writing...his liberal use of the "f-word;" uncomfortable situations that are later resolved when bad guys get their "due;" the fact that he has general "names" for characters, like "the Infected," "the Grays," "the Whites." He claims to be working through his crayon box...a comment that made him chuckle. I swear, the guy is never serious.
So you can imagine how hard it was to pin him down and get him to write the text above. Heck, I can't even get him to blog...yet. But what makes him an incredible author is the quirkiness of his imagination and sense of humor. It is with great pride that I watch as he pursues the biggest dream he's ever had...a dream that is coming true. If you're here reading this, I thank you for taking an interest in his books and helping one more person break out of the drudgery of corporate America.
I leave you with one of Bobby's favorite quotes...
Bobby taking in the beauty of Garden of the Gods park in Colorado Springs with his beloved and totally spoiled rescues, Beezle and Disco.